That is how I have been feeling lately. Ever since I quit my job to stay home, I have been checking our bank account balance more often than I care to admit.
Don't get me wrong. I am not questioning our decision. There is no doubt that God called us into this choice. He was so kind in His loud and persistent voice. But even still, I get a lump in the back of my throat when I open up my bank statement. This has been the greatest leap of faith that Will and I have ever had to make.
While we weren't called to sell all of our belongings and move to a third world country, this has been a significant change for both of us. We have always had more than we needed, and we have never had to pinch pennies. Now, however, we are card carrying members of the pinching pennies club. :)
The ugly truth is that I am putting my hope and my security in money, which is temporary and uncertain.
Our small group is studying Andy Stanley's How to Be Rich series. In the study Andy shows that all of us are RICH by the world's standards, and I'm not just talking about being rich in love or grace. We are immensely blessed with money and first world problems.
In the series, Andy asks the audience how much a person needs to earn in order to be rich. Across every socioeconomic class, the answer for everyone is always the same: MORE than we currently have.
I have met couples who have tens of millions of dollars who don't consider themselves wealthy. Why? They know people who have MORE than they do. More vacation homes, more money in retirement accounts, more cars, etc. You get the drift.
The reality is simple: We are all rich and there will ALWAYS be someone with more than you.
Just consider this: You need to make $34,000 per year in order to be in the top 1% of earners across the globe. WOW! If you make at least $34,000 you are in the global ELITE.
In December 2013, the Gallup organization reported that the median annual salary across the world was roughly $10,000.
Going through this series with our small group has been convicting for me. It has shown me that I am putting my hope in the provision, and not in the PROVIDER. If my hope is in my provider, then my security will not be impacted by numbers in a bank account.
Recently, I saw the following quote that hit a deep part of my heart:
If I wholeheartedly believe that God called us into this choice (and I do), then I must also believe that He will provide for our needs and protect us in this season. That is not an invitation to be reckless with our financial choices, but it is a beautiful invitation to stop living in fear and to trust our provider.
I don't know where you are right now in your journey. Your struggle may be very different than mine. Your hope might be in your:
- Well behaved children
- Successful business
- Performance review at work
- Home
- Collection of designer bags
- Physical appearance
- Facebook friends
- Instagram followers
- Etc.
If our hope is in anything other than the PROVIDER, we are in trouble. It may not be today, but eventually things won't end well.
Our ONLY chance at sustainable hope is God, who richly provides everything for our enjoyment (1 Timothy 6:17).
I have the following quote on my fridge to remind me that my hope is not in my bank account balance (or anything else for that matter):
"I will not put my hope in riches, but in the one who richly provides."
~Andy Stanley, How to be Rich
Right now, this is JUST a quote on my fridge. I cannot honestly say that this is the state of my heart, but I CAN honestly say that I am working on it.
Hope floats,
Meg
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